Wednesday, January 22, 2003

Take this Fat Girl!!!
In the one case of legal good sense I can remember this century, a judge has tossed out the "hey you made me fat" McDonald's lawsuit. On the surface and to 99% of the population this was a no brainer. To the indolent and trial lawyers it is a travesty of justice. The indolent and trial lawyers can go to hell.

The indolent and apparently stupid Fat Girl's father, Mr. Fat Girl Sr. said and I quote, "I never saw anything in the Bronx restaurants that informed her of the food's ingredients. I always believed McDonald's was healthy for my children." Plaintiff's lawyer and financial advisor Mr. Sam Hirsch said, "The effects of its food on people's health were a very insipid, toxic kind of thing." Many believe his statement applies to trial lawyers, not fast food, which strangely is dependent on the buyer actually making the decision to purchase and consume it.

Fat Girl Sr. stated that, "a McMuffin for breakfast and a Big Mac meal for dinner was her regular diet." Fat Girl Sr. apparently did not feel responsible for his child's correct eating habits as he was probably out doing crack, ergo, the responsibility for his daughter's health fell to the uncaring amporphus corporate giant.

This ruling seems to be bad news for one Mr. Caesar Barber, a 272 lb. solid citizen, who sensing that the fat was in the fire, was suing not only McDonalds, but Wendy's, Kentucky Fried Chicken and Burger King. As a settlement the restaurants have offered Caesar coupons for Cheese Whopper's, Double Meat/Cheese Wendy's and a super sized order of drumsticks and thighs with mash potatoes and cream gravy.